This Authoritative Wordle Personality Assessment Quiz accurately indicates how your Wordle usage reveals your character: are you a finagler, addict, or dawdler. With the utmost credibility, results will indicate your Wordle mojo to reveal who you really are and how you move through the world, one letter at a time. After all: the way we do some things is the way we do all things.

For the uninitiated, Wordle is the current COVID sourdough starter. Players’ results currently occupy real estate on many a-Twitter and FB feed, much to the delight–or chagrin–of feed-curators. But let’s face it, this game is one of the best coping distractors to deal with the current (insert name) variant.

Wordle is a simple and elegant game-concept. Similar to ‘Mastermind’ but with letters, you have up to six attempts to guess a five-letter word. The directions are easy to follow. If you know them, skip ahead to the quiz, and give yourself a point for doing so.

1. Insert a 5-letter “wordle-approved word” by typing one letter in each of the 5-empty boxes.  Hit return. If it’s accepted you go to step two, next row.

    

2. Repeat for each of rows with real words. Have no fear: you have 12K words to choose from, you won’t have the opportunity to be creative and make up words (this translates to about 33 years’ worth of words, for those of you keeping score).

   3. The boxes change colors to indicate whether your letter/word choice is correct.

• • If a box turns gray, the letter isn’t in the word. 
  •  If it turns yellow, the letter IS in the word but it is in the wrong place. 
  •  If the letter turns green, it means it’s the correct letter in the correct place. 

4. To continue, you insert new letters/words into the remaining blank squares, one row at a time. 

5. You may employ a variety of strategies (and thus, this assessment) or may not be aware of any said strategy.

6. You will have a total of 6 opportunities, to answer the correct word. You may begin to notice that your level of pride varies, based on how many ‘rows’ you need to fill until you guess the right answer.

The author of this assessment has been able to determine the word since starting to play, so ‘failing’ is currently not part of this survey. But we will surmise what happens if a player is unable to guess the word.

And comments are absolutely welcome.

And now….CTP presents The Authoritative Wordle Personality Assessment Quiz!

In this meticulously designed quiz, we have surmised that HOW you play Wordle is an accurate reflection of YOU and your current lifestyle.  

How it works:

Check none or all the answers that are applicable, then add up each one, 1 point each, for your total and with the utmost evidence-based precision – – your personal Wordlestrology insights. Again, each line you check earns you one point. You’re welcome to check as many lines in each category, as you feel represents you.

You have 5 minutes to complete this. More and you’re lame.
Begin.

On Playing

You acquired your Wordle Strategy by 

_____ Researching tweets, Reddit and the media to discover best strategies and ‘methods’ for how to play or start.
_____ Experiencing a sudden disaster and personal failure with those 5 squares and 6 rows and learning by trial and error. I’m also a kinesthetic learner.
_____ Halfsies – researching and nose diving.
_____  I’ll never tell.

You play Wordle

_____ Never, I refuse to play. I hate trends.
_____ In one sitting.
_____ By starting, stopping and returning to the game .Always between other more important responsibilities. It’s a great distraction. I am grateful.
_____ Multiple locations at once: I change my computer/phone clock. Yup. I do this. Don’t tell anyone.

You religiously play

_____ The original Wordle, online.
_____ A free spin-off app, free. In fact. I play all the ‘dle’ games. I also live in my parent’s basement.
_____ A for-a-fee spin off.
_____ All the above.

I play Wordle

_____ In the morning.
_____ In the evening.
_____ During the day.
_____ Whenever I can and I sometimes forget.

On Spelling/Wordele-ing

You start every game with (check all that apply)

_____ The same word, each time.
_____ With a completely new random word.
_____ A ratio of 3 vowels: 2 consonants or 3 consonants: 2 vowels, always popular words and vowels.
_____ Strategy? Did we confuse you? As if there “is” a way to “wordle”. We lost you. You are staring into oblivion.
_____ You’re ready to rock Wordle at 11:59 pm. Bring it.

Word choice

_____ I don’t pick a word, the word picks me.
_____ By channeling or asking my oracle.
_____ No consistent strategy yet, still in the “research and experimental development stage.’ Get back to me.
_____ There may or may not be a secret Wordle list that you may or may not have seen (give yourself 2 points for this one).
_____ No strategy. Who cares.

When at least one ‘yellow’/correct letter is in a wrong spot, you consider if that letter would 

_____ Start the word.
_____ End the word.
_____ Be in the middle. 
_____ It doesn’t matter, you only want to acquire more letters. You pick a totally new word.

Whether you have a ‘yellow’ letter or ‘green’ letter you pick a word that

_____ Keeps the green(s) in place, move the yellow(s) to another place.
_____ Ignores the green(s) and moves yellow(s) to another place.
_____ What green(s) and yellow(s) choices? You only want to acquire more letters, so you pick a new slate of letters. Booyah!

At what point do you integrate what you know is in the word?

_____ As soon as possible.
_____ At the very first row. I might even meditate on this.
_____ As soon as I get a yellow and/or green square.
_____ I don’t. I have a thing for any 5-lettered word.
_____ Not important. Rejection is a good process for me to go through regularly.

You use Wordle on your

_____ Smart phone.
_____ Laptop,  iPad or desktop.
_____ Some or all of the above.
_____ I play on two devices because the system doesn’t register it, so it seems like I perform so much better than I actually do. Ooops. I just gave up my game.
_____ My microchip allows me to do Wordle in my mind. Thanks, Bill!

On Posting – Social Confirmation

Wardle, the creator of the game, says it’s a credit to his partner that Wordle players can be as competitive or as casual as they want to be. Question is: do you let others know of your W-wins or W-losses?

How competitive or casual are you?

_____ You post every day, no matter your result.
_____ You post only on days you answer in 3 or less tries.
_____ You never post your results, but you do sometimes, instant message your buddies.
_____ You complain about other people posting, desiring more potent and meaningful shares on social media.
_____ You are not sure how to share it? You lose 10 points. Yes, really.

You Wordle to

_____ Relax.
_____ Reward yourself.
_____ Challenge yourself.
_____ Show off.
_____ Waste time.

You’re performing

_____ Better than you thought.
_____ Worse that you thought.
_____ I’ve already left the Wordle train. Moving onto other things.

I consider myself someone who

_____ Has an addictive personality.
_____ Gets great joy from affirmation.
_____ Failing is my kink.
_____ Is always up for a good time.
_____ Plays games like others drink ‘night caps.’

Rumor has it that Wardle said he wanted Wordle to feel like a croissant, a “delightful snack” that is enjoyed occasionally. This is explicitly why there’s only one puzzle per day. “Enjoyed too often,” he explained, “and they lose their charm.” 

You prefer croissants

_____ Only when in Paris, or French speaking locales.
_____ Daily.
_____ Only as a treat, like Wardle intended.
_____ Gluten free.
_____ Filled with chocolate.
_____ With a strong cafe, only.
_____ I don’t like baked goods.

SCORING

Add up your total and below you’ll learn more about yourself than you ever thought possible.

If you feel your scoring doesn’t accurately represent, feel free to self-assign a type. Just like the Enneagram. In fact, if you multiply your enneagram number by 13, then divide it by your birth month, then add the number of people in your last smart phone picture, this also is your assigned personality. 

0 -22 Dawdler, you’re seriously solitaire. SIP and Covid have been good for you and it shows. Whether you were once an extrovert or always an introvert, your pleasure-seeking ways have been thwarted by the pandemic and all the restrictions. Maybe you’ve thrown caution to the wind – – but you’ve definitely ‘let yourself go,’ grew all bodily hair and are now considered by all who know you to be in the clear margins of ‘the prepper-zone.’ Friends have found out you have stored food and water in your basement bunker, have sewn a stash of unmarked bills into your winter coats, and keep careful watch to keep up your car’s full gas tank to leave Dodge on a dime. And you desperately miss salons and intimate dinner parties.

23 – 42 Addict and very Scrabblicious. You’re vaxxed, boosted, and masked. Community conscious has been your focus and this isn’t the first time you’ve been called an elegant word hound. Stylish? Yes. You’re a great dresser and always show up classy. You miss the carefree days of international travel and hanging out at cafes. You’ve been known to be a mad contra dancer, and may or may not have attended legitimate protests during the pandemic. Masked of course.

43-68+  Finagler. You’re a classic Cards Against Humanity player. In other words, an extremely greedy aura-channeling and wildly misguided anti-vaxxer. You do all the things all the time, be damned everyone! Words Against Humanity is your go-to–not to play but to espouse your sociopathic tendencies. In fact, you’re scanning eBay now for a megaphone to shout evil on your soapbox, but take FB and Twitter as a close second venue. Your immune system is safe, it informs your actions and you are definitely remaining a Spotify user. You’re censuring all your former liberal snowflake friends. Officially.

Want more Wordleiciousness in your life? Aren’t getting enough? 

Go to the (unofficial) Wordel archive, here. Play to your heart’s content. And, those for whom this vanilla word game is not your jam, you can now play nerdle, sweardl or lewdl. Gamer beware: your quiz engagement with those cannot be applied here, yet.

And please share comments and suggestions!

Special thanks to The London Times which inspired the categories. And all the games listed are used for comic relief and a joy of games. No animals were used in creating this post.